Best Advice For Writers

joannechocolat:

These are very best pieces of advice ever given to me by other writers.

1. Writing is the easiest part. It’s the author shit that’s hard. (Ian Rankin)

2. Never, ever diet on tour. (Kate Atkinson)

3. Don’t believe anything film people say until you’re at the première,…

I’m tired.

Not so much physically tired. I’ve spent the past week catching up on sleep.

But the past week has dug its hooks in. I’m worried about things that haven’t yet reared. They may not happen. But I’d be an overly optimistic/delusional clown to really buy into that.

I know all I can do is make sure my wife knows she can talk to me when she’s ready, and that I very much want her to when she’s ready.

But damn, if she isn’t really good at internalizing and keeping quiet.

This is about the most coherent my thoughts have been regarding the What’s Next regarding my wife’s surgery. And I’m a little nervous it’s going to shake me down when I do put my attention to it.

I don’t have the time right now, and I don’t know when I will. But it’s going to hit hard.

I started to write an apology, but I don’t have anything to say I’m sorry for. I was in a loving, healthy, great relationship for four years. It was long distance, and either your boyfriend is going to look at porn or he’s going to look at you.

Jennifer Lawrence on her nude picture leak (Vanity Fair)

This is an awesome response. I have no idea why anyone should have to apologize for taking nude photos and sharing with someone. The only people that should have to say sorry are the people who stole them from her without consent.

(via punkrockmixtapes)

Whenever I think I can’t love Jennifer Lawrence more, she proves me wrong.

(via wilwheaton)

(Source: jenniferlawrencedaily)

Lemme Tell Ya ‘Bout My Wife

I know that this past week has been a tad front end loaded about my wife, but you’re just going to have to deal with that. It’s been a fuck of a week, you dig?

It was a four hour round trip, about two and a half hours on the ground. Thankfully, the missus’ pain was very manageable. The fatigue, though, was no joke. She was fit to fall asleep, I could tell. If she’d sat down, it might’ve been lights out for her. But this was the wedding of one of her close friends, and nothing was going to keep her from being there to witness the exchange of vows between two people very much in love and in respect of one another.

Major surgery went down four days ago, the kind of surgery that makes crawling into a cave for a few weeks perfectly acceptable. But even though she knew she would suffer come the morning, it was far more important to be present on her friend’s big day.

My wife lives the message. It’s inspiring, truly. Not only is it powerful for me to see, but it’s amazing to know that my daughter will see these virtues lived.

How can I not love this woman even more?

Went to the Boxtrolls last night. I fell asleep through a chunk of it, though that’s not the movie’s fault. Long week is long. From what I saw, the animation and voice acting were amazing. I know that Dragon liked it a great deal.

We’re off to a wedding today, because my wife is a juggernaut and will not let something like major surgery stop her.

plannedparenthoodla:

Consent means to give permission.
It is both people’s responsibility to get consent from their partners. Everyone has the right to decide whether they want to have sex or not.  
Consent is…
·        Freely given — no pressure, no manipulation, and no asking if it was ok to do halfway through or after the fact.
·        Informed — telling them about any STDs they should know about, being honest about using condoms and birth control, and being honest about whether you’re sexually active with other people.
·        Something you can take back — it’s ok to stop or change your mind at any time. Saying “yes” once doesn’t mean saying “yes” forever, or “yes” to other sexual activities.
·        Enthusiastic — being excited about it, not just letting it happen.
When people think about consent, “no means no” often comes to mind. But saying “yes” is really important, too. A straight-up “yes!” means that no one has to guess or assume anything, and you’ll know they’re really into it. 

plannedparenthoodla:

Consent means to give permission.

It is both people’s responsibility to get consent from their partners. Everyone has the right to decide whether they want to have sex or not. 

Consent is…

·        Freely given — no pressure, no manipulation, and no asking if it was ok to do halfway through or after the fact.

·        Informed — telling them about any STDs they should know about, being honest about using condoms and birth control, and being honest about whether you’re sexually active with other people.

·        Something you can take back — it’s ok to stop or change your mind at any time. Saying “yes” once doesn’t mean saying “yes” forever, or “yes” to other sexual activities.

·        Enthusiastic — being excited about it, not just letting it happen.

When people think about consent, “no means no” often comes to mind. But saying “yes” is really important, too. A straight-up “yes!” means that no one has to guess or assume anything, and you’ll know they’re really into it. 

Long Post

It’s been a long, trying, emotional day. Having to place all your faith and trust in strangers with likely a lifetime of crippling student debt is no small task. You want to grab them by the short hairs and say, “That’s my wife you’re cutting open, so you’d best not fuck up, you dig?” But you trust them, and you know they already know that. And thank God, they don’t fuck up any bit of it.

A world of thanks, once again, to the superb staff of Southern NH Medical Center. I trusted them with the love of my life, and they didn’t let me down. It’s easy to see something as a routine procedure on paper, but it’s an entirely different thing when it’s happening.

Thank you to my father for keeping me company while I quietly lost my shit. Thank you to my peerless mother in law for keeping my two puppies safe so I could be with my wife. Thank you to the rest of you mad bastards for every ounce of kind thoughts.

And while thanking Mrs Crabby seems shallow and not nearly enough, that’s a thing I’m totally going to do. She’s my unstoppable, belligerent, stubborn, bad ass wife, and a personal hero of mine. She’s been through more than her share, and she does it with grace.

TL:DR = For as much of a shit show as the last two years have been, I still feel blessed. Thank you for being part of that.

Everything went great! She’s out of surgery, and I should see her within the hour.

Thank you for your thoughts, prayers and kindness.

I need a nap, a good cry and a strong drink. All at once or in any given order.